Am I too Straighty 180?
I think about this a lot. I am open minded, but I have some pretty heavy morals, standards and values.
I'll set the scene.
A man I know, not incredibly well, but have a bit to do with him due to my work. He is older than I am, 10 years, maybe he is 50 or so. Businessman, well respected, quietly spoken, works a lot, doesn’t seem to have huge ego etc.
I saw him in town and stopped to say hello, he rolled down his window and I was met with an emotional man who was putting his father into palliative care. There were tears and I saw a softer side I was not prepared for. I felt for him.
He also told me that his partner was leaving, and this was another part of his struggle.
Fast forward a week or so and I shot him a quick text and checked on him. He said that his partner left the day before and it was hard, but he felt better. He thanked me for the text.
Maybe 2 weeks forward, today I see him at the beach, I've just had a long lunch break in the sun, a swim and I'm heading to my car. He is parked next to me and is on the phone, I wave and get my clothes on. He rolls down the window and we have a bit of a chat.
We talk about his partner leaving, covid, his work, his business, he had an incident at work that need the police and so on.
His phone buzzes, and I know he is busy.
He puts his phone on the dash and it buzzes the notifications are Tinder. I can see them racking up!
Insert the noise of my mind blowing.
Just to be clear:
- I don't have tinder prejudice
- I'm not interested in the man
The questions I ask myself as I drive off are?
Am I too straighty 180?
Are my morals, standards, values too strong?
Not fully understand a man's needs?
Am I not open minded enough?
Is any hole really a goal?
In my personal relationship break down experiences, I am not in a place where I could fill the void of one relationship with random sex with a stranger.
Am I lacking some sort of sexual freedom that those who frequently have tinder sex have?
With age am I becoming prude?
Have I lost faith in men? Am I becoming a Man Hater?